No matter how you feel, Get Up, Dress Up, Show Up, and NEVER Give Up has been the words of comfort for this mama and many mamas out there. To all the mamas out there, I just want to say “YOU’RE DOING AN AWESOME JOB! Not one day is the same as another, and not one event will be the same as well, yet we mama’s get through them. Why? How?
What is Motherhood?
Motherhood is a word defined with so much emotions. Motherhood is a journey of up and down roller coaster ride filled with mixed emotions. Loneliness, Pride, Self-Reflect, Courage, Wisdom, Strength, Will, Pain, Love, and Hope are a few of the words that come to my mind. Motherhood is a Lifelong relationship you have with yourself and your kid(s). It will be filled with moments of joy and fears, laughter and tears, and proud and disappointments.
No Perfect Mother
It takes a village to raise a kid, but it takes that one mom with everything to continue that path. Every mother’s journey is different. Let me repeat that. “EVERY MOTHER’S JOURNEY IS DIFFERENT!” Once we plant that in our minds, a big heavy burden will be off our shoulders. Who is to say that there is only one perfect way to raise a child? Who defined a perfect mom? Who says that there is a dictionary of perfect parenting? NO ONE! NADA! ZIP! There is absolutely no perfect parenting. Instead there are mother’s who support one another by sharing ideas, tips, information that might have worked for them. Keep in mind, that what worked for one mother doesn’t mean that it will work for another. One parenting skill might work for one family, but it might now work for another. And that’s ok! There are so many different strategies in parenting that will fit you! You just have to find what works for you. It’s a learning process that we all go through with trial and error, and once you find what works for you, it feels like you hit the jackpot.
Hard Work of Motherhood
Being a mom is not a paid or compensated job, but a rather rewarding job. It is one of the toughest jobs in the world without much recognition or pay. No one sees the daily struggle of a mother at home with her kid(s). Teaching them, feeding them, dealing with their tantrums/crying, and constantly monitoring for safety while maintains their own lives. Not all mother’s can eat while their kids eat or sleep when they’re kids sleep. That’s what they tell you to do, but it’s not always realistic. For example, while you are trying to grab a bite while feeding your baby (breast milk/bottle), your toddler could spill his whole meal and spread it all across the floor for entertainment. Or as you are setting up the table for lunch, one kid is throwing up on the floor and the other one is throwing a tantrum instead. There is never a dull moment in a ay of a mother. It’s often filled with surprises, overwhelm, cleaning, washing, changing, or cooking.
Stay At Home vs. Working Moms
I am in no position to make any conclusions, but these are based on my own experiences and opinions. I’ve had the privilege to be both a stay at home mom and a working mom (I actually worked from home so i was a work at home mom) and I’ve seen challenges of both. Therefore, I think both positions need praise. Each position as a mom is just as difficult and challenging as the others. Often a working mom will say “You’re lucky to be staying home with your children all day,” without knowing all the challenges of the day at home. And a stay at home mom would say “You’re lucky to be going to work and socializing with other adults instead of being stuck at home with kids,” not knowing the struggles of working. Both moms have their own share of pros and cons in the position they are in. Sometimes they might not have had any choices to choose to stay home or work and the choice was made for them. Or sometimes it was the best choice overall for the family’s well being. Whatever the situation might be, mother’s need to understand and support one another whether it be staying home with kids or working for a reason.
Rewards of Motherhood
Being a mommy doesn’t come easy, but it sure has it’s rewards. The moment you watch your kid(s) reach a certain milestone. Or the moment they come and give you a hug and say “I Love you,” warms up the heart. Being a mommy does not get a lot of recognition or credit as expected. Some times, all the behind the scenes of raising a child is hidden, and what we see are the kids who have grown-up in this fast pace world. All the efforts we as mom’s put in are not noticed by others, but is definitely defined in the children we have raised.
So be proud of the phases of motherhood you are going through or have already gone through. We know the accomplishments and the goals we have achieved as mother’s and continuing to do so. There’s no trophy or a medal at the end of this journey but watching the children you have raised is the reward in itself.