47+ Funny Weekend Quotes To Make You Laugh

Funny Weekend Quotes To Make You Laugh

Happy Friday leads to better days and it’s called the wonderful weekend. Kick start the Friday afternoon and lead it to Friday night and Saturday night.

Have you heard of funny weekend quotes that you can help you kick start the weekend?

Funny Weekend Quotes

• The only reason why we ask other people how their weekend was is so we can tell them about our own weekend. – Chuck Palahniuk

• Be in the habit of getting up bright and early on the weekend. Why waste such precious time in bed. – Marylin Vos Savant

• Always try to excel, but only on weekends. The world does not speak. Only we do. The world can, once we have programmed ourselves with a language, cause us to hold beliefs. – Richard Rorty

• You know what I want to do? Wake up one weekend and not have to go anywhere or do anything. – Derek Jeter

• I have to be alone very often. I’d be quite happy if I spent from Saturday night until Monday morning alone in my apartment. That’s how I refuel. – Audrey Hepburn

• I have never in my life found myself in a situation where I’ve stopped work and said, ‘Thank God it’s Friday. ‘ But weekends are special even if your schedule is all over the place. Something tells you the weekend has arrived and you can indulge yourself a bit. – Helen Mirren

• Oldtimers, weekends, and airplane landings are alike. If you can walk away from them, they’re successful. You have to have a catcher because if you don’t you’re likely to have a lot of passed balls. – Casey Stengel

• I’m learning the power of going away for the weekend and keeping myself company. I’m very accepting with my age. It’s like notches on your belt: experience, wisdom, and a different kind of beauty. There comes a day when you’ve become comfortable in your skin. – Zoe Saldana

• I respect the fact that people have worked hard all week and want to go the movies on the weekend and be entertained. – Michael Moore

• It’s a fine line between Saturday night and Sunday morning. – Jimmy Buffett

• Every man has a right to a Saturday night bath. – Lyndon B. Johnson

• A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being born-again Christian. – Artie Lange
• Old timers, weekends, and airplane landings are alike. If you can walk away from them, they’re successful. — Casey Stengel
• Weekend forecast: mild cocktails, cool parties, and silly decisions: calls to your ex. Enjoy. — Unknown 

• A wild and crazy weekend involves sitting on the front porch, smoking a cigar, reading a book. – Robert M. Gates

• Without the weekend, where would the weekend be? – Anthony T. Hincks

• Hope rises like a phoenix from the ashes of shattered dreams. Tomorrow always comes, and today is never yesterday. Weekends don’t pay as well as weekdays but at least there’s football. – S.A. Sachs

• Hands up if you’re ready to do something you’ll regret this weekend. Go forth! You have my blessing. – Florence Welch

• Weekends are a bit like rainbows; they look good from a distance but disappear when you get up close to them.  – John Shirley
• Those who continue to work at a job they hate for the money alone are more likely to be stressed, and very unhappy… They live for their vacations and weekends. Unfortunately, they are sadly missing out on the happiness of everyday life. — Catherine Pulsifer
• If my boss knew how unproductive I am on Fridays, he wouldn’t want me here either. — James Johnson
• Good weather all the week, but come the weekend the weather stinks. When the weather is too hot they complain, too cold they complain, and when it’s just right, they’re watching TV. — Rita Rudner
• Time spent for temporary happiness like movie or outing or weekend on a beach is all synthetic; with shelf life of a day or two. Work for your bigger dreams that should last for whole life. Then movie and beach would seem more interesting, realizing that you have done something. ― Vikrmn, 
• Men are simple things. They can survive a whole weekend with only three things: beer, boxer shorts, and batteries for the remote control. –Diana Jordan
• The weekend is a time for nos – no alarm clock, no rushing, no urgent phone calls, no working nights!— Catherine Puslifer
• I never really understood the glorification of Fridays & weekends. I don’t want to build a life and career where I spend five days a week waiting for the weekend. No! I want to enjoy my life and don’t wish any weekday away. I want each day to matter to me in some way, even if it’s in a small, tiny way. I love my life every day. That’s the spirit we should convey all around us. – Akilnathan Logeswaran
• Life is not a race. It is a journey, so enjoy everyday of your life. Have a nice weekend. – Unknown
• Spend some time this weekend on home improvement; improve your attitude toward your family. — Bo Bennett

Happy Weekend Quotes

• I believe that it is a mandatory Law of the Universe that on Fridays, you have to do something a little fun. — Hanna Rhoades

• Weekends are sacred for me. They’re the perfect time to relax and spend time with family and friends. — Marcus Samuelsson

• Weekend planning is a prime time to apply the Deathbed Priority Test: On your deathbed, will you wish you’d spent more prime weekend hours grocery shopping or walking in the woods with your kids. — Unknown
• “Sunday evenings often feel like the weekend is over before it’s even begun – Unknown
• Oh, I just want what we all want: a comfortable couch, a nice beverage, a weekend of no distractions and a book that will stop time, lift me out of my quotidian existence and alter my thinking forever. — Elizabeth Gilbert
• The rhythm of the weekend, with its birth, its planned gaieties, and its announced end, followed the rhythm of life and was a substitute for it. — F. Scott Fitzgerald
• To have a productive long Sunday you need to remember to wake up early, get some fresh air, set a schedule for yourself, and be goal-oriented. – Unknown
• Being in love is what makes working all week bearable. It makes cruising with your windows rolled down feel like you’re riding in a convertible. It makes you dance to the rhythm of the copy machine and makes Friday night really feel like The Weekend. – Julie Hintz
• It’s Friday morning mankind! Good vibes, don’t frown and let the monster see you smile! —Napz Cherub Pellazo
• There is little chance that meteorologists can solve the mysteries if weather until they gain an understanding of the mutual attraction of rain and weekends. – Unknown
• Sunday clears away the rust of the whole week. – Joseph Addison
• Life is a wretched gray Saturday, but it has to be lived through. – Anthony Burgess
• There are 365 days and 52 weekends in a year. Even if you are short on time off, you can still take weekend getaway. Does that count as a vacation? Of course it does. – Anita Kaltenbaugh
• Although I understand that all days are equal with 24 hours each, most of us agree that Friday is the longest day of the week and Sunday the shortest. – D.S. Mixell
• It’s okay if every weekend doesn’t lead to big moments and campfires and laughter that carries on for hours and hours. Some weekends might be quiet, still, with plenty of room to contemplate. And in that contemplation room, there is room to grow. — Morgan Harper Nichols
• Youth is like a long weekend on a Friday night, while middle age is like a long weekend on a Monday afternoon. – Richard Nelson Bolles

Inspirational Weekend Quotes

• You’ve got to be fueled by an idea, a challenge, or a wrong you’re determined to right. Without that fire from the get-go, you’ll never see it through. – Steve Jobs
• With the workweek woes melting away, remember that the weekend is a precious gift, a chance to craft unforgettable stories and make every moment count. – Unknown
• Feeling those weekend vibes? Happiness is like soaking in a hot bath on a lazy Sunday afternoon. – A.D. Posey

What are your thought son these funny weekend quotes?