How To Better Forgive Yet Not Forget

Forgive yet not forget
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To Better Forgive Yet Not Forget

Forgiveness is such a strong word with great depth to it. What is forgiveness? What are you forgiving? Who are you forgiving? Will forgiveness help better the situation? Can You forgive yet not forget?

Forgive

Throughout everyone’s lives, there will come a time where someone does something wrong to you or vice versa. It may be emotional, mental, or a physical hurt that may or may not leave a permanent scar. Feelings will be hurt and relationships may be broken. How do you forgive someone or something that caused you so much hurt? How do you let things go? It’s never an easy process to forgive anyone.

Sometimes when you forgive, it feels like it makes you vulnerable to the other person and you may feel defeat. It can make you feel like you lost the battle. But forgiving is far from that. It’s a step taken to mend a situation that caused a problem in the first place. It’s learning to say that you forgive and have accepted to move on from the situation. It means to stop the resentful angry feelings and to put a stop to a punishment of any sort.

Forgive yet not forget
Forgive yet not forget

Not Forgotten

Often through the difficulties, we learn to forgive BUT never forget. People say forget it and move on, but things should never be forgotten. Memories whether they are good or bad should not be completely forgotten because it is what made you today. Of course that doesn’t mean to sit there and dwindle on the bad memories. Not forgetting means to keep it in a memory box of learned lessons so that you don’t make that same mistake again. Instead of neglecting what has happened, you put it in a memoir of your own. Only way to not let something bad happen again is to remember the lesson you learned from it, and move on.

Let Go

Sometimes holding on to the anger and the pain that caused the issue can be harder than it really is. When you let go of those angry feelings, it can actually release you from that heartache that has been lingering inside of you. This will help you move on from the agony and the stress that might have been haunting you in ways that you might not have been aware of.

Remember What Happened

Forgiving someone doesn’t mean you need to forget what happened. It’s not always easy trying to reminisce about a negative memory of your past life. But sometimes analyzing those moments can help you surpass it and be able to understand how to cope with it. Remembering doesn’t mean you need to sit there and dwell on it for days and days. It just means that you need to keep it as part of your life that might have been a learning tool.

Learn From The Mistake

It is vital that you learn from the mistake of what causes the problem. If it hurts to bring up all the details, remember the important parts so that you don’t repeat history again. The last thing you want to do is to repeat what hurt you and have to go through the same situation. Learn the different aspects of the issue. In order to prevent yourself from getting hurt again, guard yourself before it an happen again. Know what and how to protect yourself.

Don’t Think About Revenge

Often times, when someone hurts you, the first thought that comes to mind is revenge. Revenge may not be the best solution. There is nothing worse than to try to get revenge and have it come back and hurt you more than the person that hurt you. Depending on what type of revenge is being considered, it’s not always going to go your way. Learning to accept the fact that it happened, and moving forward can be the best revenge in itself. To forgive yet not forget is not an easy task.

Therapy or Counseling

When the hurt is too deep, finding a professional help can also be beneficial instead of piling all the feelings inside of you. They can help you with coping mechanisms and methods that can help you cope and move on at the same time. Even a simple way of taking tasks on can be challenging at first but eventually it can assist you.

How Can I Forgive

It’s not always easy forgiving someone. Giving yourself enough time to cope with is probably the first thing in mind. Instead of trying to brush it off and pretending to be okay, accept the hurt. Let the feelings roll and know that it’s okay to feel the hurt.

Find support if you need it. Sometimes trying to deal with the hurt and the overflowing emotions alone might be harder than you think. Confiding in someone or even talking to a specialist can help with the coping mechanism. To forgive yet not forget is harder than it seems

Related Never Give Up

Books On Forgiving

Other ways of coping with forgiveness is through books. Words of wisdom or words from a different perspective can play a huge role in helping our minds find some sort of peace. Some of these books are rated high and have made some impact on many people’s lives. Processing some thoughts through these words may possibly be of great importance.

  1. The Forgiveness Workbook

2. The Gift of Forgiveness

3. Radical Forgiveness: A Revolutionary Five-Stage Process to Heal Relationships

4. Chicken Soup for the Soul: The Power of Forgiveness: 101 Stories about How to Let Go and Change Your Life

5. How to Forgive…When You Don’t Feel Like It

6. The Gift of Forgiveness: Inspiring Stories from Those Who Have Overcome the Unforgivable

7. The Forgiveness Journal: A Guided Journey to Forgiving What You Can’t Forget

8. Forgiving What You Can’t Forget: Discover How to Move On, Make Peace with Painful Memories, and Create a Life That’s Beautiful Again

9. All the Forgivenesse

10. Book of Forgiving: The Fourfold Path for Healing Ourselves and Our World

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